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28 January 2020

Mod-Comms or Modern Communications



It is an historic day! My Hotspot (see earlier essay) is about to go cold. It routinely became lukewarm about 12 days before the Corporate Blob was due to allocate more “minutes” to me at a confiscatory price.


I have now, once again, entered the Era of Modern Communications! Smarter Broadband has come to my rescue after I’d cut the cord two years ago! When Dear Husband was asked by the Millennial Representative how he learned about this start-up upstart company, he fudged the truth and said it was via a search engine. In actuality, we’ve been looking at their placard nailed to a telephone pole for many many months! We finally got in a hurry for high-speed on that “information” superhighway of the 2000s. And it feels marvelous to support local small business.

I’m not sure I’ll be streaming much of anything anytime soon since the streams out there look more like beta-version market-research projects. Original Content is code for Cramming My Cruddy Agenda Down Your Throat.  And a lot of the over-the-top entertainment really is over the top!  I am nonetheless over the moon joyful that I do not have to meter and monitor usage of my Minutes throughout the allocation time frame of about 30 days. The experience felt too much like, well, hard times, poor times, early days, and all-the-time during various phases of my past lives! You’ve heard of past-life regression? I’ve been experiencing past-life progression. Although Internet Rationing may be the next privation measure mandated in California! Re-allocation of i-net living space might become a reality for the urban dweller!

I have come to realize that online reviews of anything are ripe, ribald and rapidly-taken opportunities for egotists, narcissists and nutcases of any kind to show up and show themselves! A review for a discreet dress-hat was replete with photos of Madame Brassy and Mesdames Hussies wearing the hat in the midst of much cleavage. The French use a term that means “car bumpers” (not bumper cars) for such private parts. Those bumpers bumped me away from that vendor, and not with too much pare-choc!


There are also the online reviews that reveal the comically appalling ignorance of one too many individuals. Last year, I was in need of a new tea kettle, and I purchased a lovely model online — but the reviews for this splendid spouter of hot water included quite a few complaints that the kettle kept whistling after the burner was turned off! Real-life experience, Physics 101, or even common sense, had no bearing on these derogatory witless Know-It-Alls.

Along with the smarter broadband, there will be stupider sites and sights. I fully expect even more displays of sassy stupidity. Yup, the benchmark is quickly becoming: the faster the connection, the more fatuity and slowness of mind do we find!


My first smart move is to watch my San Jose Sharks, who, coming back from the All-Star Break, still have a losing record; they’re not quite 50-50 in the standings. Lack of a permanent coach is another factor to consider in their performance this season. I therefore think they have a shot at the playoffs! No pressure to perform just might mean the players start having fun — and play, especially play to win the game.


That goal must somehow be communicated to everyone, everywhere, maybe through a smarter broadband!