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The End of 2021

ZOOM-Age Euphemisms

and their Reality-Based Translations

Hopefully, this linguistic gobbly-de-gook will be outmoded by this time next year. I’m an optimist!

There is only one way to deal with the massacres of language, and the stupid-pill addicts who perform the botched messaging of public pronouncements. And that’s to laugh them into the next century.

You know who the usual, and only, culprits are, so I need not repeat the names of the once-quasi legitimate professional employees, and the utter bunglers of formerly functional industries and professions. They’ve all been prostituted and bastardized, and are presently being given the Brandon.

I was inspired to compile this list by a statement made to me this morning by Dear Hubby, who, during the past day or two, has transformed himself into the Stage Hand of the Christmas Light Show.

I’d been inquiring as to the possibility of any non-Asian-manufactured outdoor lighting for The House. He paused and then stated:

“Keep an open mind.”

That “suggestion” really means:

“You will likely hate this idea, but we are going to do it anyway, over your objections.”

That very unhidden agenda is the modus operandi of public serpents and their globalist shills and media morons in America, and around the world.

The House of Cronyism Cards — politicos, lobbyists, fonctionnaires, and investors in any funded-group, identified by 2 or more letters (UN, NGO, WHO, IT, NDPB, NPO, NHS, NIH, CDC, EU, OECD, BBC, DOJ, DHS, NHTSA) in that alphabet soup of corruption — the members of that House now appear to be frantically fiddling with the chips at their big-pharma dice table. (Well, they don’t call it craps for nothing.)

That ploy is commonly used by the croupier, or blackjack dealer, to break up the flow of the positive-gambling-karma and to distract a winning player from winning any more moolah at that table. (It never worked for me in the casino, and it still doesn’t work to divert my attention from reality in the Big Casino called life.)

The stakes must be sky-high for the Climate Change Pandemic/Emergency to have popped up as the next corporate-politico con-game. The Covid-financed COP-26 Crisis was a non-blimey snooze-fest, a complete fiasco for those universal-crooks. But once a fool, always a fool. I am speaking of the buffoons on the world stage, pitching a snow job that is melting in the dead of winter.

Who’s zooming whom?

I’ve only ZOOMED once during this past year, and, even then, the other side of the Zoom blinked out before it began. I was fully visible, however!

I’d researched the mechanics of this new “reality”, and discovered the advent of Zoom makeup. There is foundation specifically designed to prevent looking like Tin Woman. Matte eye-shadow also helps to convey that authoritative online appearance. Satin lipstick is permissible, but limit the illuminator/highlighter/bronzer on the cheekbones, or I daresay you will be blinding your audience with glow.

“Glow, little glowworm”, is best sung, not seen.

Dear Husband zooms, weekly, but he does not allow the Other Side to see him. He’s delicate in that way.

It’s important to properly understand ZOOM-Age language. I’ve been immensely aided by my professional background in translating engineering and geologic terms into comprehensible jargon for not just the layman, but for the engineer and geologist as well!

Euphemisms are the starter course for this digital lingua franca. They tend to be comedic, even if they come from crooked sources and venal mouths.

The ZOOM-Age euphemisms of global proportions are countless, but I’ll start with a dozen.

1. Follow the _________ (e.g., The Science) = Follow the money.

2. The International Banking Community = The Loan Shark of Yore who lends money to people, companies, and countries with bad credit ratings, and on terms that make repossession look friendly, even benevolent.

3. The Online Safety Bill/App/Passport/Ticket/Mandate = You, the Citizen, Will Never Be Alone, or Left Alone by the Public Parasites Fixated on Ripping You Off.

4. It’s to save lives. = It’s profitable for __________.

5. The Director/Minister/Secretary/Chairman of Whatever (Justice, Safety, Health, Military, Security) = The Person with the Earpiece to Carry Out Orders from the Greedy Globalist Ghouls of Quid Pro Quo.

Those putrid paragons of faux virtue amassed millions, perhaps billions, of quid while millions of commoners died, many of them alone. Although those helpless victims were never alone, and they were not completely without help. God was with them, every step of the way, as they faced evil, and prevailed over it. The hand of God vs. the face of evil: I’ll bet on the Holy Spirit, from whom the marker of retribution will come due one day . . . too soon, in the opinion of the guilty parties; not soon enough, IMO.

6. I do remember = I completely forget.

7. Uphold the integrity of = Trash it with the utmost of obscenity and vulgar indignity.

8. It’s for the People. = It’s for my bank account.

9. Victim = Aggressor.

10. Aggressor = Victim.

11. Have a good one. = Go to Hades.

12. We just want to help you. = We want only to terrify, terrorize, intimidate, lecture, bully, fine, manipulate, silence, and control you. Failing those money-making objectives, we want and wish only to vilify, punish, crack down on, incarcerate, blacklist, fire, and, if profitable, sue you to further silence you.

The coming year will, most likely, usher into our purview the sob-stories from these moral cretins in elective office, and in charge of corporate blobs, secretly siphoning off all of that gaslight-accumulated-wealth. They were tricked and fooled — coerced — into believing the bilge of lies that they themselves made up. All to make a killing. What price greed? They shall inevitably pay the price, the ultimate price, for the hysteria of Covid-19.

Their election-year mea culpas will monotone thusly:

But no harm was intended! We didn’t mean to ban God, or strip you of those civil liberties that we now know we are entrusted to faithfully protect for you, The Electorate.

I shall provide the unvarnished interpretation for that futuristic euphemism #13, the unlucky digit for those dingbat swine:

“Oops. We got found out. We’ll keep a low profile until the citizen-outrage goes away. It’s a good thing we got away with as much payola as we could from this crisis-caper. It’s good we grabbed our crates of cash from the emergency-power scheme, before that gig was over. That’s the problem with these one-time swindles. You’ve got to find another one.”

There is no good within these people. They do not care one iota about the voters. They shrugged an indifferent cold shoulder at the caissons of corpses that rolled forth from their filthy get-filthy-rich game plan. They do not care a whit about whatever else comes their way, just as long as they keep their hush money, and graft, and bucks for bureaucratic bamboozling.

These martyred maniacs, with their crocodile tears, care only for coin and mammon, babes, booze, designer drugs, and the sugar-high from being on an endless drunk of power over the little people.

The little people aren’t so little anymore. They aren’t silent anymore either.

When the amoral lackeys “in charge” of a nation, born of Western Civilization, treat the citizenry as do the communist slave-drivers and despots of China, i.e., replaceable and meaningless units of humanity, then those usurpers of the public trust, and of democracy, have sold whatever scintilla of virtue was left of their souls to Lucifer. Maybe, one dark hour, even Beelzebub won’t have time for them.

The miracle of life is the spark that lights up the blackest night. The zoom age foreshadows the victory of virtue over those evil imposters who believed they were gods of the universe. Their penny ante approvals, bans, consent decrees, dispensations, hypocrite-health opinions, and foxtrot fiats unmasked them last year.

This year, the miracle in the Manger is celebrated with the truest spirit of Christmas.

“And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.”